♪ Creepy Crawlers ♪
- Creepy Crawlers. - Creepy Crawlers.
- [Advertiser] Creepy Crawlers.
- Creepin' and crawlin'
♪ Ucky, yucky, squirmy wormy ♪
- Creepy Crawlers. - Plastigoop.
♪ Bug brigade ♪
- [Advertiser] Creepy Crawlers.
♪ Dirty ♪
(woman screaming)
♪ Creepy Crawlers ♪ - Creepy.
(no audio)
In 1964.
Yes, 1964.
We are going that far.
In 1964, Mattel released a product called the Thingmaker.
- Thingmaker. - Thingmaker.
- Which, long story short,
was basically an Easy-Bake Oven on steroids.
A glorified hot plate
that should have never been given to children
in the first place.
- [Advertiser] Just plug it in.
- Kids would squirt Plastigoop into a mold
and then put them into the Thingmaker.
And then a few minutes
of heat-induced chemical reactions later,
out came a thing.
(gasps) Whoa.
And probably a bunch of health problems.
But first, the thing.
Oh my god, the thing?
The toy included a selected amount of mold sets,
from cars, fighting men,
and, you guessed it, Creepy Crawlers,
their most popular mold at the time.
- [Advertiser] You can tell it's Mattel.
Swell.
- Thingmaker was pretty much a major hit
for Mattel in the 1960s.
But after the decline in sales
and a rise in safety concerns,
it was discontinued in 1978.
What's the safety concern, you ask?
It was a hot plate.
They gave kids a hot plate
and told them, "Have fun with it."
You do the math.
Or try to do it on the fingers that weren't burned
by the Thingmaker in 1964.
- [Advertiser] Thingmaker.
- As the '90s approached,
the rise of consumer nostalgia rose
for the Boomer generation,
which, in 1992, prompted a man named Steven Lebensfeld
from a company called Toymax
to gain the licensing and patents
for a product called Creepy Crawlers.
Woo!
(Mac laughs)
And the female counterpart, Treasures 'n Trinkets.
Come on, get it, girls, 'cause it's pink.
And because the mid-'80s
seemed to be the period where people actually started caring
about safety of children,
instead of squirting Plastigoop into a sizzling mold,
kids injected it into the mold, into an oven
that would not unlock until it was fully cooled.
Ingenuity, right?
The new and safer Creepy Crawlers worked,
and sales boomed within the first year.
And the Creepy empire was born.
They even developed a partnership
with Power Rangers and Jurassic Park.
Everything was looking up for these little guys.
Until it all went crashing in 1996.
Then they tried re-re-releasing the product
in the year 2000,
but unfortunately that fizzled out about a year later.
But then in 2002,
a magical company called Jakks Pacific
decided to buy out Toymax
and proceeded to keep on releasing the Creepy Crawlers line,
plus some remixes and additions
for the next few years after.
But now, the toys aren't even listed on their website.
And here we have it today, girl.
♪ Creepy, creepy ♪ (eerie music)
- Yeah.
The Creepy Crawler, ladies and gentlemen.
I like making these videos with a mic in my hand
'cause I feel like I'm selling you guys the product.
That's, like, my main goal.
I'm trying to make you guys wish you were me.
But I feel like all I've done so far
is just garner a bunch of sympathy about my life choices.
But Creepy Crawlers, ladies and gents.
I remember this toy for a brief period.
There was commercial for it every two seconds
on Nickelodeon.
And I was a Nickelodeon boy growing up because I was trashy.
And I remember they kept on showing this,
and my gullible ass really wanted this.
Not because I was a boy
and I was into, like, creepy crawlers and spiders and shit
and gushing and goo and all that fucked shit.
It showcased something that looked very sciencey.
And I am a boy that loves me some science experiments.
Well, my parents never got this for me
because they said it would be messy.
Well, I'm gonna prove them right.
Today, we're going to learn
that maybe my parents did make a good parenting decision
in not getting me this at all.
I believe the original Creepy Crawlers come with an oven,
but this one does not at all.
I had to buy this one from eBay.
It's been sitting in a box for, like, two months.
But now I've finally got the strength to open it,
and for all of us to see,
was our childhood worth it?
I don't believe so.
Every single one of these videos I've done so far,
we've all just found out it was just a scam,
one after the other.
I believe this is the 2000s version.
2010.
Oh, this is 2010.
Girl?
This is from 2010, and I had to buy it from eBay?
Oh, this bitch flopped.
♪ Creepy Crawlers ♪ (eerie music)
- The whole box is in English.
So now we know why it failed. (laughs)
Creepy Crawlers Bug Maker.
Make, fill, smash.
Ooh.
And a different language.
Make-o, fill-o, smash-o.
(laughs) Ooh, Italiano.
French?
Le make, le fill, le smash.
Ha, oui, oui.
And I also like that, on the box,
they also advertise other toys you can get.
Like you can get a toy that smashes the bugs,
instead of you smashing them yourself.
That's fucking stupid.
♪ Creepy ♪ (eerie music)
- Includes one Bug Maker main unit,
one knife.
Oh no, we're giving kids knives?
Jesus Christ.
What is this?
And requires four D-size batteries.
Not included.
Give me a second.
♪ Creepy ♪
- Okay.
Jesus Christ.
Had to go digging for a few minutes, girl,
but we got it.
As you can see, this package has not been open,
but I believe I've had these batteries
for, like, three years.
D-size batteries was such a 2000s toy thing
because these batteries are fucking expensive.
These batteries probably cost more
than a lot of the toys that require them
used to cost back in the day.
I'm so sorry, parents.
I'm just now realizing how expensive it was
to raise a child.
(Mac laughing)
That's why I'm gay, bitch.
The tape was completely disintegrated.
Let's keep that in mind.
Ooh.
Get out, get out.
(box rumbling)
There we go.
There he is, there we go.
Fuck you.
(Mac moaning)
Okay, let me stop.
So what we have here is
some
radioactive-looking shit.
This looks like it was,
used to be something,
but over the years it turned into something else.
This is gonna be fun.
I mean, ooh, wow.
Ooh, my god.
Don't you wish you were me?
About to get a chemical burn and shit?
Girl, this looks like it evaporated.
Molds, eggs,
with a syringe.
That is...
(stern music)
Kids don't know what drugs are at that age, okay?
Let's just stop thinking about that.
And, boom, here it is.
Creepy Crawler.
Ooh. - Help me, help me.
- Now what do I do?
Where do the batteries go?
Why does it need batteries?
What part of it is battery operated?
Where are we?
(woman screaming)
The little quick start instructions here,
the first thing it says is,
"Read the main instructions sheet
for using the product for the first time."
There was no instructions sheet.
So now I feel like I was just fucked with.
The person that sold me this on eBay
told me it was unopened,
but, girl, I think it was opened.
Girl, I might need to get my money back.
Okay, give me a second.
I'm gonna go to Google.
- Creepin' and crawlin'.
- So a lot transpired in the 20 minutes
that I paused this video.
First off, I have diarrhea.
Just feel the need to say that out loud.
Y'all probably didn't ask for this, but you know what?
We've gotten close over the years. (laughs)
Second off, while Googling,
trying to figure out how all this works,
I decided to open up everything and laid it out.
I then found the instructions.
Which I feel like is kind of a flaw, okay?
When I open up packages from, like, the 2000s or so,
usually the instructions are, like, right in front.
As soon as you pull everything out,
the instructions come with it.
But in this thing,
they decided to package the instruction with the tray.
So you just go in
straight-up thinking they forgot the instructions,
and you start opening everything up,
and then, suddenly, boom,
the instructions are right in front of your fucking face.
I don't like that.
I don't like that game.
That's called deception.
But here we are.
I put it all together.
I put in the batteries.
It requires four big-ass D batteries, girl.
No wonder this shit flopped.
Do you know how much D batteries cost?
No, real question. (circus music)
Please answer me that,
because I bought those, like, two years ago.
I do not remember.
Caution. Do not eat.
Why?
When I first got this,
did I believe that it was a candy maker?
100% strongly remember that they made a candy maker
for candy bugs once.
Like, I can't be going crazy about this.
Like, they made this before.
They made candy makers before.
Like I'm not crazy, right?
I don't know, but I can't eat this one, apparently.
So now I'm sad.
Keep away from eyes.
Yummy, yummy, yummy.
Is there a different language?
This whole thing is just in English.
It's only English.
That's so disappointing.
So we already have a mold in the molding block.
I'm just gonna go with this mold.
I don't give a shit about...
What is this?
What the hell is this?
Girl, I don't know.
"If you wish to create a hollow bug
that you can fill with bug goo,
use the clear bug molds."
Place the core, what?
Girl, I don't fucking know.
I just wanna make a bug.
Don't give me options.
What the fuck is this?
- [Advertiser] Creepy Crawlers.
- Insert the bug mold frame into the Bug Maker as shown.
We gotta put its pussy up towards the dick.
Not scientific words.
Shut up.
Loose the bellows by rotating locking rings counterclockwise
until it stops.
Okay, okay, okay, I was like, "Girl, what's the bellows?"
"Warning, to avoid personal injury,
never insert hands or foreign object
into the Bug Maker dispenser unit."
Or what?
You gonna fight me?
Because I'm ready to fucking fight.
We can fight.
I can fight. Do you know I can fight?
Do you know I can fight?
I can fight. (woman screaming)
So we gotta insert two bug eggs into
the bellow?
Girl, okay, whatever, wig.
Do I open it and grab it,
and then place it in there by itself, like, raw, dog?
Girl, wig, let's go.
ASMR opening bug tray.
(plastic crackling)
That was not pretty.
Let me do the other one.
Let me do the other one real quick.
(plastic crackling)
Wait, hold on.
(plastic thudding)
Did you cum yet?
I'm so sorry.
So three eggs in the pussy.
Let's go.
Ooh.
What if this is not working at all, girl?
What if I can't even get this off the phone?
Are you guys ready for this?
Ready for this?
(seductive music)
Fuck yeah.
Okay, now let's do a red one.
(Mac moaning)
There we go.
And into the hole?
Yummy.
You hard yet?
"Align the tabs on the bellows
with the notches on the dispenser unit
and attach the bellows onto the dispenser unit."
Ooh, what the fuck does that mean?
It's time to turn it on, girl.
"Now the power on indicator will light up
indicating the unit is turned on."
So here is the moment of truth.
Will it turn on?
Let's see.
Did it? I can't tell.
The light's on, the light's on, the light's on.
Okay, so it's on it. It is on.
Okay, so I'm into this.
You see this?
They have an entire different situation
about heating up the Plastigoop and entering into the mold,
compared to when you used to just have to, like,
put it in a oven
or, like, a fucking hot plate bullshit shit.
Now they have an entire mechanicism-nism,
with the twisting and the fucking.
And you know, girl. You know.
Where does the knife come into place, though?
Like, why did you give kids a knife?
Why do I feel like I need to stab somebody with this
just to prove a point?
♪ Creepy Crawlers ♪
- The ready light will come on in 10 to 14 minute.
Girl, we are only doing one bug.
- Crawl, crawl. (bug screeches)
- Okay, it's ready, look. - I'm horny.
- That was the longest 10 minutes of my goddamn life.
"Press down on the handle of the dispenser unit
and make sure the nozzle
is entered into the big mold, TM, hole.
Before each use, when the unit is cold,
use the tweezers to remove any hard..."
Okay, whatever, fuck.
Okay, so into the hole.
Press the bellows down slowly and gently.
Are y'all ready? (laughs)
Okay, here we go.
Oh, shit, it's already filling up.
(Mac gasping)
Oh my god.
Ah.
Come on, is that it?
I think that's supposed to fill the whole bug.
Why is it not...
The bug mold is not fully filled.
It has not fully filled the bug mold.
It said three eggs,
and the three eggs did not fill the bug mold.
Can I just put in the egg?
I'm just gonna put in the egg.
I'm gonna hurt myself.
I'm an adult, I can do it. - Help me.
- Okay, no, I got wait, I gotta wait,
I gotta wait a few minutes.
Oh, it's not even ready anymore.
Jesus Christ.
I'm just gonna sit here and wait.
I'm gonna wait for it to...
Oh, nevermind, it just turned green.
Here we go. (laughs)
Are y'all ready?
Here we go.
(Mac gasps)
Hello?
Come on, come on, don't do this to me.
Don't do this to me.
It's not coming out.
Guys, it's not coming out.
Guys, I think we broke it. (laughs)
Wait.
Nope, oh my god.
Shut up.
Did I really just break it?
Why is it not oozing out anymore?
The girl is not girling.
She's not girling.
(gasps) Oh my god.
Putting another one in.
I will not give up.
Come on, come on, come on.
Come on, give me some.
There we go.
Nope, nope, I lied.
I lied, I lied, I'm lying.
It's not...
(bellows hissing)
That was a weird-ass noise.
It's not doing it anymore.
I think it got clogged,
and I'm too lazy to figure out how to unclog that shit.
Yep, it got clogged.
It's just pushing out from the top.
(microphone thuds)
(Mac laughing)
Oh wow.
Well, ladies and gentlemen, here we are.
Half a bug. (laughs)
Welp, let's put it in an ice container for three minutes.
Wee!
And there we go.
Like, it just gave up on me.
Wait, let me see.
Oh my god.
Yep, it's broken, girl.
Broke the toy within the first attempt.
Girl, that has to be a record.
Like, it just gave up.
Wig. (laughs)
Shall I sing to us all as we wait for these three minutes?
♪ Ooh, Creepy Crawlers ♪
♪ What the fuck ♪
♪ What the fuck is this ♪
♪ Ooh, Creepy Crawlers ♪
♪ You should have just gave me the fucking hot plate ♪
♪ Ooh, Creepy Crawlers ♪
♪ Now we see why this toy flopped ♪
♪ Ooh, Creepy Crawlers ♪
♪ After one attempt, the bitch just stopped ♪
And I relate. I relate so much.
Okay, I think it's been three minutes.
Okay, I'm over this.
Let's see what the fuck.
Ooh, oh, ooh, ooh.
And finally...
Ew.
♪ Creepy ♪ (eerie music)
- This is it.
This is what we fought for in the 2000s, you know?
This is what they brought back for us.
Creepy Crawlers.
I can see where it's trying to go.
Like, it made half a spider,
which is, like, really cute,
but at the same time, what the fuck, you know?
I'm the loser here.
I'm the loser after all, guys.
I cannot sell this for shit.
I think I'm never going to leave the space
of y'all just giving me a bunch of sympathy.
But what did we learn today, kids?
We learned that this shit was stupid
and we were sold on imagination
and spirit.
What did we learn today?
If you try to bring back a toy from the 1960s,
it's gonna perform like a toy from the 1960s.
Racist.
- It's icky. - Oh, yummy.
Ooh, ooh, eat it up.
Oh, mm.
That's what I like in my meals.
That's hilarious.
But you know what?
It's a video.
It's a YouTube video we're going to do and publish.
Thank you guys so much for watching.
If you have any other toys that you want me to review
or try to get my hands on,
leave it in the comments down below.
Shout-out to @infintewolf
and @Gabe-with-a-bunch-of-numbers
for retweeting my last video on Twitter.
And that's it.
Need to go shower, girl.
I feel sticky.
Like, I feel like I'm covered in chemicals.
I don't know why.
Oh, this is all supposed to be the goop
that was gonna go inside the bug.
So when you squish it,
it's supposed to make like a, "Ah, bug goop."
Boys are gross.
Anyways, my name is Mac.
I have a Shorts channel if you wanna check it out.
Also, the Japan trip is still going on, August 12th,
if you guys wanna join.
There'll be a link in the description
for all the information for that.
Other than that, I'm going to go.
Don't forget to like, comment, share,
and some screaming.
(Mac screams)