[spooky music playing]
Okay, everyone, places.
[groaning]
[chuckling] How was that?
Mmh, not quite there. I think we need to lose a limb.
No, Lucy, no!
Here, Lynn, don't forget your chainsaw.
Ah.
A little homemade blood and you're good to go.
You're a real pro, honey.
I should have let you do this years ago.
That's okay, Mom. I'm just glad to finally get my chance.
I'm so thrilled I can barely contain myself.
I know, honey. I can see it all over your face.
Ooh, what's this?
Ancient Book of Spells.
Whoa!
Mmh, if I can't get through to my siblings,
maybe a little magic will.
[humming]
So you can't help spilling your chemicals on my stuff.
Call of goat, slips of yew, turn clumsy fingers into glue.
Oopsie.
Hmm, that's atypical.
[chuckling]
[glass breaking]
Of course now I have to tinkle.
[thundering]
You're watching Fright TV.
Up next, the season premiere of Vampires of Melancholia.
This is it, Edwin,
a whole new season of our favorite show.
Can't wait to watch it.
Just you and me.
- Hey, Luce. - Scoot over.
Ah!
What are you doing here?
The Dream Boat is on Monday nights, remember?
[both] Duh, we're here to watch VoM.
First, please don't call it that.
Second, you guys have never been interested in my show.
- Why are you-- - [squealing] There he is!
Whoa, this place looks sick.
[squealing] Blake Bradley!
Who?
Duh, literally the cutest actor ever.
Didn't you know he was gonna be a new character on VoM?
Sigh. It's called--
Yo, anybody home?
[sighs] Why is he literally so dreamy?
Yikes, who's that creepy guy?
That's Edwin, the main character.
[screaming]
I hate Halloween!
I love Halloween.
Bleagh.
Excellent fake blood, Lisa.
Add some molasses for better consistency.
Hey, Luce, check out our pumpkins.
What do you think?
Mmh, more blood here.
A few more gashes on this one.
Knock out a tooth.
Add some ooze to those scabs.
Dampen the head wound.
Halloween's kind of crazy with a spooky little girl like you.
[thundering]
I so enjoy our nightly strolls, Fangs.
I keep trying to talk to Rocky
but every time he runs away from me.
What am I doing wrong?
Well, what are you talking to him about?
The usual stuff.
Blood, bruises.
I didn't even get a chance to show him my new embalming kit.
You know, maybe he's just not into that kind of stuff.
Then what is he into?
I don't know him very well, but he just seems
like a regular normal kid.
Regular and normal, hmm...
Regular and normal...
Oh, watch out for Jupiter. He's full of gas.
- Hey, Lincoln. - Ah!
Lucy, you got blood all over my school project!
Relax, it's fake.
Sigh, unfortunately.
Hmm, needs more molasses.
That'll give it just the right amount of ooze.
I see you've found my blood.
It's my new recipe: beet juice, molasses and cocoa powder.
Hmm, now it's got the ooze, but not the splatter.
Hi, I'm Lucy.
I have a new deck of fortunetelling cards.
I could give everybody readings.
- Me first! - Oh, yeah!
Over here, Lucy! Over here, Lucy!
It's Madam Lucy.
Ooh...!
Lori, you will go on a long trip.
Ooh, maybe Bobby's taking me to Italy!
He is working at that pizza place.
Lola, the universe will open doors for you.
[scoffs] Tell me something I don't know.
Luan, you will soon be blown away.
How fortunate!
[laughing]
- Good one! - Ow!
Poppycock.
Could these predictions be any more nonspecific?
Lisa, you will make an amazing scientific discovery
before entering the park today.
Is that specific enough for you?
Specific? Yes. Plausible? No.
As a woman of science, I cannot take any of this seriously.
Well, the cards don't lie.
Last but not least, Lincoln.
[gasping]
What does it say?
So, uh, who wants to play football?
Lucy, come on, tell me!
Fine.
Your day at the park will end in... tragedy.
[dramatic sting]
Ooh, a radio station of music stings!
Neato-burrito!
[dramatic sting]
[panting] Lucy!
Hey, Lola. Glad you're here.
I just drew the ace of wands, which means you're going to--
Never mind that, we need to barricade the door!
Help me move this dresser!
Uh, want to tell me what's going on?
[sighing]
Okay, I took your creepy doll
and then I broke her, and now she's haunting me!
I'm so sorry, Lucy. You told me not to touch her
and I should have listened to you.
You broke her?
She looks fine to me.
That's... Yeah, that's not your doll.
That is!
Whoa, how did you even do this?
Well, it began as a simple tea stain,
and then things kind of progressed from there.
[sighing] I'm a terrible sister.
No, you're not. I forgive you.
It's not like you did this on purpose.
Thank you, Luce. You're really nice.
So, can you please get her to stop haunting me and stuff?
She was probably just haunting you
because you took her away from her rightful owner.
Now that you've given her back, I'm sure she'll leave you alone.
Phew, heh. Wow, that's a relief.
And sorry again for wrecking your doll and stuff.
Wrecking her?
Now that I know she can haunt people, I like her even better.
Heh, of course she does...
Good evening, fellow members of the Morticians Club,
I've called this meeting because I have terrible news.
[excitedly] Oh? Terrible news?
[screeching]
Shhh!
Oh, no, no, no. In this case, the terrible news
is nothing to be excited about.
My father accepted a job as a lifeguard
on the SS Fun Times party cruise.
[playing organ notes]
And since I cannot legally separate from them...
[playing organ notes]
I must move with my suntanned family.
- Bummer. - Sorry, Bertrand.
Thank you, dear friends, but, please,
dwell not on my misfortune.
Instead, let us focus on more important matters.
[clears throat]
[playing organ notes]
Try and keep up, Boris.
More important matters like
who will replace me as president?
[together] Gasp.
[screeching]
Next, you have to watch the show as a vampire would,
in one of these.
Ugh, this provides zero lumbar support.
It's also really hard on your back.
I cannot spend a whole hour in this.
Wait, I know!
Decorative throw pillows!
They'll add support and a little zhuzh.
Ooh, and we can use the lid to make a fun TV tray!
Melancholy night before a hopeless dawn,
the sun is rising soon, but all my joy is gone.
Boo!
[shouting]
Oh, I don't wanna do this.
It's for her own good.
I'll show you how it's done.
That poem is terrible!
I've been more moved by Lynn's farts!
Aww, thank you!
You smell weird, your hair is wrong,
and I would not recommend you to my friends!
Mean little blonde,
you throw stones and sticks,
but what would you know?
You're only six.
Oh, spirit of Goldie, our late family fish,
who really flushed you?
Guys, I'm glad I can't use my phone
because this conversation
literally had to happen in person.
[giggling]
Oh, spirits, I summon thee.
[screaming]
What? No, she did not!
Oh, spirits, I summon thee.
[screaming]
Okay, first, we send in recon falcons
to assess the enemy's firepower.
Grrr...
[thundering]
Okay, now I'll just need a strand of your hair.
Strand of red hair, stinger of a bee,
cure Liam's arm so he can...
ahem, pitch pain-free.
[thundering]
- Anything? - Ho-ho! Oh, wait!
That's unbelievable!
I got no pain at all.
But let's see if I can throw.
[grunting]
- Boom! The Cow Pie Kid is back! - Ow.
Hah, nice try, Luan, but I'm not falling
for another one of your fake spiders.
Though, this one looks pretty real.
[screaming] Spider!
No!
Worst surprise party ever!
Frank! No!
I just want to say I'm sorry for your loss,
and that I'd be honored to serve as funeral director.
I keep an assortment of caskets on hand.
Were you thinking shoebox?
Or, for a little more money, mahogany.
Oh, honey, these pillows would be perfect for the nursery.
I can't decide. "Rage against conformity"
or "embrace the darkness"?
Get 'em both, you might have twins.
I think I found your ghost.
I was able to dig up this old Fairway yearbook from 1900.
[coughing]
[gasping] Shanks Bogey, that's him!
Armed with this most intimate info,
it's time we make contact with Shanks
and let him know he's dearly missed at Fairway.
'Tis a time to putt, a time to play through.
Dear spirit of Shanks,
we summon thee back to Fairway U.
[together] 'Tis a time to putt, a time to play through.
Dear spirit of Shanks,
we summon thee back to Fairway U.
[gurgling]
[gasping] Look, is that Shanks?
[shuddering]
[gasping]
[croaking]