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hey there everybody today I wanted to take an opportunity just to answer some questions that I frequently get about counseling the first question is how do I know when I need to go
to counseling and I wish I could tell you that there was a very clear answer but there's not
it's kind of like when you have a cold some people go to the doctor as soon as they have a sniffle
other people can be borderline pneumonia before they think they need to seek medical intervention
now the reality is probably somewhere in between but when we're talking about mental health issues
everybody and I'm confident saying that I know that's an extreme word but everybody
gets depressed sometimes everybody feels anxious sometimes you know these emotions that we talk
about these symptoms that we talk about in terms of mental disorders you know it sounds really
pathological and really scary but ultimately it's important to recognize that most people
experience a lot of these symptoms occasionally so that being said if you're experiencing a symptom
or a set of symptoms and it is causing you what we call clinically significant distress
it's impairing your ability to live your high quality rich and meaningful life and you've tried
to address it and it's just not working then it can be really helpful to talk to a counselor or a
social worker or even your doctor but a counselor is usually in a really good place to help you with
practical Solutions a doctor May say well there's nothing physically wrong with you or worse yet
minimize your symptoms so I like referring people to counselors a pastoral counselor or
a clergy member can also be a really good help it depends on who you feel safest confiding in
a counselor is not a magician you know yourself better than that person knows you you've been
living in your body for 20 30 40 years maybe more maybe a little less but you live with
yourself every day you know what works and you know what doesn't now there may be other things
out there you haven't tried and those are the things that the counselor is supposed to know
but ultimately you are the one who can look at a solution and go yeah that ain't gonna work
or hmm that seems like something that might work seems like something I might try you
are the expert in General on when your symptoms started and you probably have an idea about the
root cause and what's and what is causing those symptoms and maintaining them what started it
so it's important to feel like you can talk to your counselor so once you I kind of went into the
next question here what do you do in counseling once you've determined hey I need a little help
to get jump started or I'm stuck and I need somebody to help me move forward from where I am
right now because I just can't quite shake these symptoms all right so a counselor can help you
now once you decide that you want to see a counselor it's important to know that there
are different types of counseling humanistic counseling or person-centered counseling is the
most non-directive of the popular counseling methods now and in humanistic Theory the
premise is that if we provide a safe supportive environment for you to explore your thoughts and
feelings you will through basic free association if you will through talking be drawn to your stuck
points and process through them now that takes a long time a lot of people would prefer some level
of cognitive behavioral therapy in addition to humanistic they want to feel heard they want to
feel empowered they want to feel safe they want to feel like the counselor is supportive of them okay
you know that is not exclusive to humanistic therapy that is something that should be true
in every type of therapy whether you're talking about Freudian psychoanalytic or you're talking
about humanistic or cognitive behavioral a lot of people think cognitive behavioral is very cold and
impersonal and it's not cognitive behavioral just tends to be more active it tends to involve the
person and saying okay let's make a plan and then let's use some principles of Rapid cycle change
to figure out what is going to help you move forward what's going to help you get unstuck
when you first walk into a counselor's office you sit down and remember you are the person in charge
yeah it's their office but you're in charge you're paying them you hired them just like
lawyer you if you're hiring a lawyer you're the lawyer's client if you're hiring an accountant
you're the accountant's client if you're hiring a counselor you're the counselor's client you
are the person that is hiring the professional to help you move forward faster yeah you can do
your own taxes uh you don't necessarily have to have an accountant but it sure goes a lot faster
yeah you can process your own stuff and do a lot of self-help and probably eventually get to the
same end point but it certainly goes a lot faster if you have somebody who can help direct you along
the way and show you some tips and shortcuts but again you are in charge and if it doesn't
feel like you're making progress if you don't feel like you get something out of most every session
then it's important to have a conversation with your counselor and say you know what
I'm I'm feeling like we're not making a lot of progress this is what I was hoping to see happen
uh it's also within your right and I really encourage people to have a copy of your
treatment plan all of my clients work with me to write their treatment plan we do it together so
we're we're both brainstorming what's going to work and what is manageable in every period of
time a week a month three months and then I give them a copy of it it's like their roadmap you
wouldn't go on vacation and say hey I've got two weeks off and I want to get to San Antonio Texas
and just get in the car and start driving and turning wherever and you know not having a plan
not having some sort of directions now if you're driving and you run into a Road road construction
you may have to take a detour same thing in life same thing in counseling you have a plan from how
to for how to get from where you are now to your rich and meaningful life but along the way while
you're working on your stuff other stuff may happen you may lose your job or you may have
some sort of crisis in your life so you have to take a detour for a little while and that's okay
you're not committed to that treatment plan a hundred percent it can't be changed once you
write it but that is your starting point that is your guideline and then if you need to detour fine
you make an amendment to it so ultimately just kind of to kind of sum this up counseling is a
place where you can meet with somebody who's an expert on techniques and tools that can help you
move toward your goals faster but you are the expert on you you know what's going to work for
you and you need to feel empowered to ask to be involved in your treatment planning to ask
for a change in approach if it doesn't feel like it's working you are the one that sets the tone