Unsurprisingly, a lot of people
were against Trump's idea to impose tariffs
on every nation in the world.
But the strongest opposition
came from within the president's own party.
House Speaker Paul Ryan's spokeswoman
releasing the following statement
warning against the move, saying in a statement...
That's gonna turn around and bite American citizens
with much higher taxes, much higher... much higher costs.
It's only gonna hurt American consumers and our allies.
Please reconsider your solution.
Trump has really worn Lindsey Graham down, like...
Yeah, the presidency has basically turned him into
America's most tired babysitter.
He's just like, "No crayons on the furniture.
Please consider your position."
And by the way, am I the only person
who still thinks it's weird that lawmakers have to go on TV
just so they can speak directly to their president?
It's like, "Thank you for having me on, Wolf.
"Now, listen, Mr. President,
please don't impose the tariffs."
Like, it's only a matter of time before lobbyists
start planting their agendas inside Happy Meals.
'Cause they know Trump will find it. "Oh, boy!
It's Coco, the Deregulating Panda!"
But I'm not surprised that they're pulling out
all the stops to try and sway Trump.
Because, you see, economists have warned
that starting a trade war could increase the cost of living
for Americans across the board.
Although, according to Wilbur Ross,
commerce secretary and living Werther's Original,
the impact won't be so bad.
What I would like to do, though,
is to emphasize, again, the limited impact.
In the can of Campbell's soup,
there's about 2.6 cents,
2.6 pennies worth of steel.
So if that goes up by 25%,
that's about six-tenths of one cent
on the price of a can of Campbell's soup.
Well, I just bought this can today
at a 7-Eleven down here,
and the price was $1.99.
So who in the world is gonna be too bothered
by six-tenths of a cent?
He's so cute.
It's like you can't even hear what he's saying.
(muttering)
He's like a white Ben Carson over here, you know?
Yeah. Can you imagine him and Ben Carson
having a conversation together? It would last forever.
It would be, like, "Have I told you about my soup cans?"
And Ben would be like, (mimics Carson):
"The best can of all
is the human skull."
(laughter, applause)
Now...
Now, Commerce Secretary Soup Dog might be right
that one individual can of soup won't go up a huge amount.
But the problem is that when America imposes
a tariff like this, other countries could retaliate,
and then things escalate.
The international community is responding
to President Trump's desired tariffs
on steel and aluminum imports.
TV REPORTER: Officials from the European Union
vowed to impose taxes on U.S. goods,
including Harley Davidson motorcycles,
bourbon whiskey and Levi's jeans.
In turn, President Trump threatened
to tax European cars.
If the E.U. wants to further increase
their already massive tariffs,
he'll add a tax on their cars.
You see? It started at steel and aluminum,
and now we're up to whiskey and jeans.
And, honestly, I think the European Union
is going about this the wrong way.
You're not hurting Trump by threatening Jim Beam
and Levi's, all right?
Trump has never touched alcohol,
and he doesn't exactly have what we call "jeans ass." Okay?
(laughter)
And so now, you would think
Trump getting all these bad Yelp reviews
on his tariff idea would make him think twice.
But, joke's on you, he doesn't think once.
President Trump is doubling down on those tariff proposals.
Yesterday he tweeted
that trade wars are good and easy to win.
The truth is, trade wars aren't easy to win.
In fact, already a study has shown
that even before a trade war,
Trump's tariffs, by themselves,
could cost Americans 146,000 jobs.
Yeah, and don't forget, the past two presidents tried
this type of thing, and it didn't work.
George W. Bush tried steel tariffs, too,
and studies showed that they cost America
far more jobs than they saved.
And President Obama put tariffs on tires,
but they ended up costing Americans thousands of jobs
and nearly a billion dollars.
Yeah, a billion dollars on tires.
I mean, I know us black guys like spending money
on wheels, but goddamn.
Now, although Trump's solution may be extreme,
that doesn't mean that he's wrong
about the underlying issue.
Because the truth is, China is dumping steel into the U.S.
and it is hurting American steel companies.
So Trump is right about the problem,
but his solution will cause even bigger problems.
He's like a doctor whose great at the diagnosis,
terrible at the cure. You know, it's just like,
(mimics Trump: You have skin cancer,
so I'm gonna chop off your dick.
Wait, what?
But like it or not, Trump is the doctor America chose,
so it's ultimately his call.
So even if it's bad policy,
America could be headed for a trade war,
which, to be honest,
of all the wars we thought Trump could get us into...
I mean, nuclear war, a race war...
a trade war is, like, the least bad option, and...
it'll make the next Call of Duty completely different.
NEWSWOMAN: President Trump threatening
a surprise trade war over steel.
A wild week made him eager for a fight.
NEWSMAN: He said trade wars are good. They're easy to win.
TRUMP: Well, I'd love to have a trade war.
MAN: The president was wrong.
Trade wars are hell.
Hang on to your ass.
We're gonna raise the price of steel.
MAN: We had no idea
how cruel the enemy could be.
You want to raise taxes on steel?
We will tax your jean shorts.
You son of a bitch.
-How much is a Bud Light now? -Six bucks.
You're a long way from Econ 101, bitch.
Who in the world is gonna be too bothered
by six-tenths of a cent?