If Michelle Obama can get through moving into the White House,
you can make it through moving into your college dorm.
Look, moving into the White House,
nobody would tell me after all that I'd done,
that I would have to then yet make that transition
where I left my home, brought my kids to not only another city,
but to another house where the world was looking.
But here's the thing. It was because I learned how
to transition throughout my life
because I didn't quit when it felt hard.
That's how you make it to the top.
When my family dropped me off at college and finally drove away,
I had my first ever anxiety attack.
Now when I thought about college when I was in high school.
I was too ready to be living on my own.
Like, no more rules. Curfew does not exist.
And McDonalds will now become a food group.
But when moving day came, I was terrified.
Living on your own for the first time
can be uncomfortable and scary.
But don't worry. By the end of this video,
you'll have plenty of tips that will calm those nerves.
I'm CC Allen from Now This, and you're watching
"A Student's Guide To Your First Year of College."
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Today's episode is all about living on your own.
So let's go to Chelsea Fresini, Senior Program Manager
at the Opportunity Network
to learn how you can make the best
of moving away from home.
I work with students just like you
who are going to be the first in their family to attend college.
I was the first in my family to go away to a four year school,
so I know the particular realness of that.
You need to make sure that you are managing your time.
I think people might also think no parents, no rules,
up all night, crazy sleep patterns,
crazy eating patterns, but it's helpful
form our bodies to stay on a routine
for healthy eating and sleeping.
You need to check in with yourself,
whether it's daily or every week
to see how are you doing, how am I feeling,
how is it going. Do I need to do something differently?
I can't stress enough that when you go to college
and when you're living on your own for the first time
to build in some me time.
Even if you're living with roommates,
make sure that there's a time every day or every week,
even if it's that you take a walk around the block on your own
or you find a quiet corner of a library
or when everybody's out, you actually stay in.
Make that time for yourself to have some me time it really recharge.
It can be so helpful as a college student.
Explore and say yes to a lot of opportunities,
but also when things start to kinda like rise up as being more less important to you,
and, like, feeling like a better fit maybe over others,
feel the power of saying no.
What works for somebody else might not work for you. And advocate for yourself.
Learning how to share space
I think it's gonna be hard for me just because I'm so used to
having my privacy and just keeping to myself.
So just being open and adapting
to living with another person.
Relationships take time, and they can be active.
And you all know from any relationship that you have in your life.
There can be an ebb and a flow to it.
There's a stranger now that you're gonna live together in this dorm,
And you're, you know, this far away from each other in the room.
You have your bed, you have your desk and everything.
You're just like, "Hey, I'm Chelsea. Like, good to go?"
- Great roommate? You don't know. - No.
If their staying up late is keeping you from getting the sleep that you need,
to feel confident and empowered to be able to have that conversation with them
to find a solution that works best for both of your self-care.
Definitely do not be afraid to ask for help,
especially when you're living on your own for the first time.
You're gonna have to do it, and you should do it.
More often than not, there is a resource on your campus
or at least somebody on your campus that can direct you
off campus to that resource, so that you can get what you need.
If something feels wrong, it might be wrong.
And that something might not be you.
And it's important to feel your feelings
and communicate and ask for help.
Because you don't want to just keep feeling like,
"It's all on me. I have to get through this.
It's all on me. I have all this pressure.
I will persevere. I will do it."
There are many things that you can persevere from.
but if something is feeling really wrong to you
and making you feel unwell,
chances are that there is something there that's wrong
that you might not be able to solve on your own.
So ask for help.
I think knowing that it's okay to kind of share your struggle
and find some community on campus or--
and other circles that you're in to support each other
and lift each other up during a difficult time.
Grocery shopping. I would say make a lot of quick, easy, healthy snacks.
See, the laundry room, it depends on where you go,
but, you know, some may only have three, you know, washers and three dryers.
Set a timer for when your clothes are gonna be done
because if your clothes are sitting there for hours,
somebody's gonna be bound to, you know, remove your clothes
'cause they need to wash their clothes.
So just make sure you're on top of your laundry.
Literally schedule out your day.
Classes, workout, lunch time, when to eat.
'Cause you will forget to eat when you're in college.
Sleep time, put that down 'cause you will forget that as well.
And me time. Definitely will forget that.
It really will help you.
Don't scare yourself. Give it a try.
Get a meal plan. Ease into college.
Maybe when you move out of the dorms
or move on to your next living situation.
Maybe then you can start cooking for yourself,
but get a meal plan.
Ask for help. There's lots and lots of people
who have gone through this before, so just ask for that help.
I think in terms of living on your own,
you have to be very thoughtful about all the things now
that your parents do for you, which you don't realize.
Simple things like waking up in the morning,
especially if you sleep in late.
Keeping your place clean, taking care of your health.
Both your mental health and your physical health.
How you congregate around friends.
How you organize your time.
You know, there's lots to do.
You have in your mind
that I should feel a certain way.
I should not miss home. I should be feeling fine,
and if I don't, that means I'm gonna quit.
You can't make that conclusion
about your experience in the first semester.
You gotta give it some time.
You gotta give yourself patience.
Fake some confidence, okay?
'Cause you gonna be faking it for a while,
and it's okay. We're all faking it.
And your classmates are faking it, too.
They're all wondering whether they're capable of doing it.
Because here's the thing about transitioning
is that you gotta learn how to get through transitions.
because the best things in life that are waiting for you
are gonna require you to transition just like getting from high school to college.
You're practicing transition.
And ever transition you do and get through and stick with it,
that's gonna make the next one easier.
Independence comes at us fast, and it's completely natural
to have an assortment of feelings.
But what starts as unfamiliar to you now
transforms into easy and comfortable if you work at it.
So let's go over everything. One, establish a routine
where you're building and maintaining a healthy lifestyle.
Two, set aside me time. Decompress and gather yourself in a stress-free environment.
Three, advocate for you, which means recognizing
and communicating how you're feeling.
Four, never be afraid to ask for help,
which goes hand in hand with five.
Find your friends because they can be
the people you can voice your problems to.
Thanks for watching and stick around for more
of "A Student's Guide To Your First Year of College."