- I just was terrified!
- I'm just gonna be this 80-year-old
with a tramp stamp.
- Whatever, you know.
This could be really, really stupid.
- I absolutely hate it!
I hate it!
(ominous music)
- Hi, my name's Ken,
and I'm gonna tell you about my tattoo horror story.
So I'm a huge Spice Girl fan.
(laughing)
Favorite Spice Girl is Posh Spice.
Victoria Beckham is amazing.
I decided to go to a tattoo parlor
for their $30 tattoo day and get a cheap tattoo
(laughing)
I have never done that before,
and I was like, "Why not?"
And I go in, and they have an easel
with all their tattoos that they're offering for $30.
I didn't see anything that I liked.
Nothing was a Spice Girl.
There's nothing cool except for letters, and I was like,
"All right, I'm gonna get Posh written on my wrist."
I went and I paid for it, back in line.
And I think they had two tattoo artists
that were doing it,
and it was just like, this mechanical thing.
Like people were just going in, out, in, out.
Probably should have been like,
"Maybe I should come back on another day,"
but nope, I wanted this tat.
They're $30 tattoo!
Best thing ever.
So finally, after maybe,
I don't know, a couple hours of waiting, my turn.
This guy was not pleasant at all.
He just looked miserable.
I understand.
You're tattooing people all day, but I'm like,
"This is my body!"
(laughing)
"Don't do that!"
(laughing)
I was trying to be extra friendly,
and I'm like, "Hi!"
And he's like, "Hi."
And then he takes out the razor.
(razor slicing)
To cut my arm hair off.
My underarm does not have that much on there.
He just started, kind of just painting away
with the razor, and blood was everywhere.
And I'm just sitting there like--
He gets the temporary tattoo,
which he puts on first just to show me,
and it was a little bit bigger than I wanted.
I was really scared to be like,
"This isn't what I wanted,"
because he looked like hell.
Like he was not having it.
So I was like, "Okay. We're here.
"I'm bleeding. Let's get this over with."
(laughing)
I let him just do what he wanted.
(laughing)
45 minutes later, he was done.
During the process, he was wiping every once in a while.
And he wasn't wiping like, ink or like the blood
from his tattooing, it was the blood from the cuts
that he made on my wrist with the razor.
I just was terrified,
with a smile, because I don't know what to do.
(laughing)
He put on the clear plastic, you know, bandage
around my arm after I was done.
I looked at it, and it looked like it was, like,
like it rained blood on my arm.
I walked out.
Never went back there again,
and I don't think I'm ever gonna
get a cheap tattoo ever again.
(laughing)
It's not what I wanted.
It does not speak posh.
It doesn't look like something Victoria Beckham would like.
If she saw it on me, she'd be like--
I like it because it's part of me.
(laughing)
Let's leave it at that.
- Hi, I'm Farryn, and today I'm gonna
be telling you about my tattoo horror story.
I got my first tattoo when I was 21 or 22-ish.
It was true what they say, like,
once you get your first one, you're sort of addicted.
I got my next one probably like six months after that.
Then I got my next one probably like a year after that.
And then I got my next one like six months after that.
I was with my girlfriend for like, maybe a year or so,
and she was really into stars.
One day we were walking around, and she was like,
"We should get tattoos today,"
and so I was like, "Okay, that's fine."
You know, I'm addicted now.
I've gotten one, so now I'm like, a big deal,
so, like, I can get another one.
We went into the tattoo shop,
and she found the one that she wanted,
and then I was like,
"I'm not really feeling any of these,"
but I was like, "I'm just gonna do it 'cause I love her."
And then I stumbled upon the one that I have now.
Like, one big star, and then like,
five little stars, like, around it.
Why I chose that, I don't know.
Next thing to do was to choose where I'm gonna put it,
and of course, at like 21-22, you're like,
"Where's the best place to put a tattoo?
"I know! My lower back!"
Then, to add insult to injury,
the tattoo shop that we went to was sort of sketch,
so they did a really, really terrible job.
And so now, any time you rub your fingers over it
or your hand over it, you can feel it.
So like, I'm reminded of this
day of my life that I wish I could take back
by this like, Braille tattoo that I
have on my back right now that probably says, like,
"You're dumb" in Braille.
Imagine every single time you, like,
wear a bathing suit, or, you know,
you're meeting somebody for
(mumbling)
they're asking you, like,
"What is this tattoo on your back?"
And every single tattoo that you have
has a really great meaning and story
except for this tramp stamp.
I've thought about getting it removed,
but it just seems like such a big, like,
waste of money and time, and I've dealt
with it this long, I can deal with it a little bit longer.
I'm just gonna be this 80-year-old with a tramp stamp.
And I can't stop saying "tramp stamp"
'cause that's what it is.
- Hello, my name is Merle,
and today I'm going to be telling you
about my tattoo horror story.
Journey back with me.
I was traveling with one of my very best friends, Steven.
We had just had a wonderful New Years Eve
in Nakhon Si Thammarat, this teeny, isolated
little fishing town in Thailand.
And then a hurricane came through
and almost ruined the rest of our trip.
We had flown to this other part of Thailand,
and the plane almost crashed.
They wanted to get a stick-and-poke tattoo,
and I'm like, "Psh, I'm gonna live life on the edge!"
I'm gonna get a teeny, teeny, teeny, teeny
little five on the inside of my elbow
because five is my number.
We had heard through another friend
who was living in Thailand that this place was legit.
This tattoo parlor was at a bar.
Bar might be a stretch.
A shack with a corner with pillows on it,
a bar that sold joints,
then there was a back alley area
where you could get tattoos.
The place did not look clean,
I'm not gonna lie to you.
It didn't look good.
I'm introduced to the man who is
going to be the one performing...
what do you even call it?
Not surgery.
The, the...
doing the thing.
He's this little man with wild hair.
His eyes are like, this wide.
I know he was on something,
but he was taking it very, very seriously.
He's like, "Are you ready?"
I'm like, "Sure."
He takes out the needle.
There's no certificate on the wall for cleanliness.
There's no promise that this, whatever, you know.
This could be really, really stupid.
There's a woman who's running topless behind me.
These are the sounds and sights that are around me
as I'm about to get my first tattoo in Thailand.
I was tested later.
Totally fine, no problems.
I'm good.
We're good.
The way I did it probably wasn't the smartest,
but it has a happy ending.
I love my tattoo.
So is it a horror story?
Let's call it a near horror story.
If my mom knew how this happened,
she would be horrified.
So yeah.
That's how I got my first, and only, tattoo.
- Hi, I'm Alaina,
and today I'll be telling you about my tattoo horror story.
I only have two tattoos currently.
I will get more.
But the second tattoo I got, I was like,
"Oh God. I'm not sure I'll ever get another tattoo again."
I think with tattoos, you always have the thing that's
in your head, and then the thing that ends up being
on your body is slightly different, probably,
than what you had in your head.
But like, that being said, like,
a lot of artists get close.
Like, especially if you're, like,
working with the artist.
I had this idea in my head that I wanted to
get a tattoo with my pets on it.
I had a bunny named Empanada,
who was just an absolute legend,
and I have this kitten named Taquito.
I wanted to get kind of like a yin and yang almost,
where their bodies kind of like, fit into each other.
And I finally found the perfect human, and I thought,
"Oh my God, like, I love every single thing she makes."
Like, there's no way she can mess this up.
We booked the appointment.
I had sent her an email with, like,
a bunch of pictures and videos of my pets
because I wanted her to, like, be able to see them,
and, like, get their personalities and their likeness.
She's like, "No worries. Thanks for sending
"all those things. I'll just be in the back drawing
"for, like, the next 20 to 30 minutes,
"and then I'll come out and, you know, we'll get going."
An hour goes by, and she's not back from drawing.
And then an hour and a half goes by.
I'm, meanwhile, getting very nervous.
Like, why is it taking so long?
And then she comes out with the sketch,
and I absolutely hate it.
I hate it!
I'm starting to make these, like,
very panicked, like, calls of like,
"Well maybe we just change, like, this little detail."
We start trying to change this,
but, you know, I didn't know how to say no.
I didn't know how to be like,
"I don't like this."
She like, went to the back to, like, redo the parts
that we had, you know, talked about redoing,
and meanwhile, I'm having, like,
a low-key panic attack.
And at this point I realize this tattoo
is gonna cost, like, several hundred dollars more
than I had originally thought it was going to.
So I'm just like, "Oh my God.
"I'm about to make a very expensive mistake."
I didn't want to like, upset her,
or make her mad at me or disappointed,
and that's very, very silly because this is, like,
a stranger who I will never see again.
She comes back out with the second sketch,
and I still don't love it,
but at this point I'm exhausted.
It's been like, two and a half hours,
and I'm just like,
"Okay, it's fine, it's fine. Just, like, put it on me."
I'm done.
Like I'm done being able to, like,
feel anything about this.
Just like, put it on me.
And so she did!
Because I told her to.
I would have rather, like, not disappointed
a complete stranger than let them put something
on my body that will absolutely not go away
unless I remove it with like, lasers and shit.
I wish I had made a lot of different choices.
It's not a contract you've already signed
once you've walked in the door.
Find diplomatic ways to be like,
"Let's pause. I need to think about it."
Like, as you continue to change,
you can continue to play with, like,
how you're expressing yourself visually on your body.
(upbeat acoustic guitar music)