Magnum P.I. did a crossover with Murder, She Wrote.
As absurd as that sounds, it is a true statement and that’s what I’ll be talking about
in this video.
Admittedly, I don’t know much about Magnum P.I.
It stars Tom Selleck and despite his older self being a man of questionable scruples
with a smug dad attitude, in his younger days he did do a good job portraying this character
throughout the 80s.
I’d say on the moustache scale he’s somewhere between Burt Reynolds and Elliot Gould.
Also, remember that time he played a character on friends who dated Monica?
That was weird.
Quick rundown - Thomas Sullivan Magnum the 4th works as a private investigator for an
erotica author named Robin Masters, who is never seen but is voiced by Orson Welles in
a few episodes.
Magnum lives Robin’s beach house in Hawaii, so you’re gonna see a LOT of this shirt,
and shares the estate with his assistant, Higgins.
Magnum’s life is pretty damn extravagant, and thus he can afford to take cases whenever
he sees fit.
That’s what you need to know; it’s a pretty basic show but it was popular during its 8
season run from 1980-1988.
As we begin the episode, titled Novel Connection, we see Higgins driving some guests up to the
beach house; they are quite eager to meet Robin Masters.
I mean, who wouldn’t be with book titles like Echoes of Ecstacy under his belt.
I had trouble remembering their names, due to their distracting haircuts, so I will label
them for you: This one is Pamela, this one is Amy, and this one is Joan.
As they are driving, a truck approaches them and runs them off the road, nearly killing
them.
Cut to WHOA HELLO LEGS.
I really don’t like it when scruffy private investigators have better legs than me so
I’m already fairly irked with this episode.
I’m also not enjoying this damp shirt look; it’s not cute.
“Welp, I’m moist from the waist down again.”
Magnum’s friend Rick tries to talk him into getting a loan so he and his other island
companion can make a bid on a some land in Maui.
This has nothing to do with the plot, I think it’s just there to showcase Magnum’s ineptitude
for being fiscally responsible.
Magnum: “I can’t get qualified for a loan that fast.”
Rick: “I hadn’t thought of that.
I guess you can’t qualify at all.”
The rattled guests arrived in the now damaged car, and Pamela blurts out that she believes
someone is trying to kill them.
Magnum responds by staring in her general direction.
One of the other ladies attempts to flirt with Magnum while Higgins talks about...something.
I couldn’t focus on what he was saying because I was so intrigued by this unique hair style.
It’s like the opposite of a comb over; instead of hiding the receding hairline we FOCUS ON
IT.
Just fuck up HALF my shit.
Magnum says he’s willing to take on this truck case and Higgins is like “Don’t
even think about it we’re not hiring you”, and Magnum responds by staring in his general
direction.
Joan, the woman who hit on Magnum earlier, sneaks into his room with salacious thoughts
on the mind.
Maybe she was turned on by his damp fuckin’ shirt earlier, who knows.
Joan: “I only need 5 minutes” I only need 2.
While it looks like she is propositioning him for a good time, she’s actually just
interested in hiring him as an investigator to look into the truck incident.
I mean, I know I always wear my best teddy and get my flirt on when hiring someone for
contract work.
Joan: “I just love watching a man pack.”
Magnum gets jealous upon hearing another investigator has been hired but subtly tries to hide his
feelings by telling Higgins he never even wanted the case.
After Higgins says he won’t divulge the identity of the new investigator he throws
a fit then says he could have handled the case, and Higgins is like “No, it’s not
that simple” and Magnum is like “NO U” and there’s some weird kindergarten squabbling
going on here.
At the last minute he decides to go to Maui to look into that whole land thing even though
he has yet to get qualified for a loan.
His partners said they were able to get qualified right away.
TC: “Application?
We just called our banks and got qualified over the phone.”
Wow, rekt.
Pamela stops by to make Magnum feel even worse about not hiring him for the truck case then
throws a tantrum about the security of the beach house when she sees Amy randomly taking
the Ferrari out.
Pamela: “God give me STRENGTH.”
And a better haircut!
Higgins: “Hear, hear.”
Magnum decides to tail her, secretly wanting to take this case despite the protest of his
friends as they are supposed to be going to Maui.
He finds And watches some random dude follow her; he calls her out by name, she freaks
out, and they drive off.
Magnum eats a hotdog.
Meanwhile, Pamela makes another effort to complain about Magnum’s competence.
Higgins does his best to defend him.
Higgins: “He isn’t without merit as an investigator.”
He just likes EXTRA short shorts.
Magnum returns to tell them he saw Amy get chased away by someone, but didn’t go after
them nor did he get a license plate number.
Now Amy is missing and both Pamela AND Higgins are disappointed.
Higgins: “Magnum how could you?”
I hope you’re getting used to this look of utter dejection because this is pretty
much Magnum’s natural state.
Despite no one wanting Magnum on this case, he decides to go down to the station and snoop
around, rifling about the evidence like a nimrod.
Let’s see, lemme just get my fingerprints all over this…
I do like Magnum’s attempt at buttering up the Captain, though.
Magnum: “It’s 6am, wanna get some coffee?”
Captain: “Get out Magnum.”
And he strikes out.
On top of Amy missing, Joan has now also gone missing.
Pamela takes a moment to once again tell Magnum how much she doesn’t like him, and Higgins
keeps trying to get him to mind his own business.
Magnum’s concern over this new investigator seems to be eating him alive.
Magnum: “I have a right to know who’s replacing me.”
Higgins: “You’re not being replaced, you were NEVER HIRED.”
Magnum decides to do some further prodding, visiting the office he saw Amy visit before
she was chased away.
He uses the prescription he found earlier to figure out where it’s going to be sent
and while attempting to find her, the runs into the mysterious man.
I’m hesitant to play you even a single note of the music in the background of this part
during due to copyright reasons, but trust me on this: It is the most amazing, silly,
intense, and eighties thing I have ever heard, and I implore you to seek out this episode
just to experience it.
Magnum is able to bait this guy into following him and confronts him in a hotel room.
Unfortunately the person staying in the room thinks it’s being broken into and bashes
Magnum right on the noggin.
What ensues is a mildly exciting action scene.
He finds Amy in one of the hotel rooms and brings her back to the beach house.
He tries to get more info about why she went into hiding but she’s unwilling to admit
anything is wrong.
That’s probably important to the plot but who cares, JESSICA IS HERE!
FINALLY!
Unsurprisingly, Magnum is smitten by her presence.
Ah, she just lights up a room, she radiates sunshine and grace and intelligence.
I was pretty blase’ about this episode until now.
With Jess here I am precisely 1000 times more into it.
Higgins’s reaction pretty much says it all.
Higgins: “Oh my god.
JB Fletcher.”
Yep.
Jessica was somewhat tricked into coming here by Pamela, a friend of hers, though she does
seem willing to stick around and look into the case despite insisting that she is not
an investigator.
She immediately manages to impress Magnum with her incredible observation, pointing
out the exact type of flowers Higgins was tending to without even seeing the garden.
Isn’t she beautiful?
Higgins: “Forgive me, I’m somewhat overwhelmed.”
During lunch, Magnum decides to play coy about whether or not he’ll take this case.
He’s being pointedly childish about it, clearly not happy with everyone shooting him
down up until this point, even though Jess directly asks him to take it.
She always pulls out the big guns when trying to convince someone to do something; god I
love her eloquent manipulation tactics.
She expresses how happy she is that he’s taking the case, then ignores his denial as
though she hadn’t even heard him.
Magnum: “Uh, I’m not on the case…”
Pay attention to meeeeeeeeeeeee!!!
Oh hey, Joan is back!
Everyone is somewhat happy she’s safe.
Somewhat.
Magnum finally blows a gasket and demands the three women for answers about why they
are being so secretive, when someone takes a shot at the group.
Magnum decides to run after the person who did it by slowly sauntering right into the
open.
Whoever it is manages to drive away.
Magnum decides to take the case once again and insists that Jessica minds her own business.
Magnum: “It’s getting too messy for amateurs.”
Oh honey.
No.
Later, Jessica decides to drop by Magnum’s room to offer some help and observation, which
Magnum is very resistant to.
She had picked up on some evidence that proved both Joan and Amy have been lying about their
whereabouts and the details of who they are in general, but Magnum is like “yeah yeah,
leave it to me, a professional.”
Jessica: “Good luck with your investigation.”
The sexual tension is thick.
While Magnum is having a beer and lamenting about how much better Jessica is than him,
SHE is doing actual work by studying the trajectory of the bullet fired earlier.
Higgins admits to Jessica that he could have enemies out there wanting to take his life
and believes the shot was for him, but Magnum insists that the bullet must’ve been for
Joan because he found a lead off camera or something.
He insists on looking for her at some party I wasn’t even aware was happening until
now.
I like Jessica’s almost goth dress.
This is where the episode gets a little higgelty piggelty.
Jess and Magnum are on totally different wavelengths - Joan is missing AGAIN and Magnum is theorizing
that a man named Mr. Mayfield, a professional hitman, was hired to kill her.
Higgins is still convinced the bullet was for him and Magnum gets all confused for the
500th time.
On Jessica’s end, Pamela is explaining that she discovered her employer, a VERY powerful
publisher, is embezzling company funds; she believes SHE’s the one the hitman is trying
to murder because of this.
I swear, EVERYONE thinks they are the one who is going to be killed.
“I’m the one who’s gonna be killed!”
“No ME!”
Mayfield shows up to the party, Joan suspiciously comes back and everyone is like, “Joan what
the fuck stay in one place”, and everything just goes a little bonkers in the last 5 minutes
of this case.
Before Jess leaves with Pamela to go back to NY to confront the embezzling employer,
she suggests to Magnum that it might be Amy who could be in trouble, not Joan.
Once again, Magnum resists all of her help and posits his own theories about why he’s
right, and why she’s wrong.
Jess: “I’m sure normally, you’re very good at what you do.”
Ohhh, burn!
All right, let’s wrap this up.
Magnum finds the hitman, chases him all throughout the estate while some radical electric guitar
blares in the background.
A few shots are fired back and forth and Mayfield is wounded.
A little later we find out that Magnum was right about the hitman, and receives a gift
of congratulations from Jessica, because she’s lovely and caring like that.
Higgins has absolutely NO poker face and admits to his obvious crush on Jessica, throwing
around the idea of visiting Maine to see her some time as he leaves Magnum to his reading.
Awwwww, he bought her book!
And look at that smile; Higgins isn’t the only one smitten.
All right, final thoughts on this episode: It’s...strangely shallow.
The best thing about this episode is the fact that Jessica is in it; the main plot is really
boring, and the filler about Magnum and his friends going to Maui doesn’t add anything
to it.
In the end it turned out the land deal was a hoax anyway so it really didn’t go anywhere.
Nobody even gets murdered, which I suppose isn’t mandatory for Magnum, P.I., but considering
this is a Murder, She Wrote crossover I did expect something a bit more thrilling.
I’m not even really sure I understand this plot, it’s not very clear.
The details about why Joan was being targeted come out VERY late in this episode and the
motive to have her killed isn’t the most clear because it’s not mentioned prior to
this very short scene of Magnum discussing it with Higgins.
I watched this three times and while there seems to be a lot going on, there’s really
very little.
It seemed like the writers were more excited at the crossover aspect of this episode than
the actual plot; I can understand the distraction.
Having Lansbury in your show is enough to make anyone’s brain foggy, but ya still
gotta have a solid story line.
Luckily for me there is another Magnum PI crossover on the table and this time it is
on the Murder, She Wrote side.
So this is going to have to be a two parter, huh?
How many times will Magnum look dejected in THIS episode?
Well, stay tuned for next time when I discuss “Magnum on ice.”
Hey everyone, thanks for watching part 1 of my Magnum PI, Murder, She Wrote episode.
It certainly was…interesting.
If you want more Murder, She Wrote check out the links on the screen, and if you want to
support me directly then consider pledging to my Patreon campaign.
A like and a share wouldn’t hurt either yanno.
Do it for Jessica Fletcher.
As always, I’ll see you in the next one!