Only one chip left.
Race ya for it.
Okay. I'll try.
[music playing]
Hands on the table.
On three.
[music playing]
One.
I've hidden food all over the house.
We can pretend to eat Piper's food,
but really we can... catch up on our reading.
Uh, book cheese.
Yep. Finally found a good use for books.
[chuckles]
Ooh, I'm supposed be on a liquid cleanse. Whatever.
Hey, what are you guys doing?
Ah, we are... reading.
A book.
So many great words.
I like this cheese but now I want some bread.
Walk with me.
Oh, Henry...
come look at this box of Fresno Girl Doll
that Piper brought home today.
I love to Daddy.
Be careful. Those are worth a lot of money.
Oh, we will, Piper.
Would you like some bread... from a head?
We should hang out more.
[laughing]
What if more come and then the aliens
take over the Earth and use us humans as food?
- That will never happen. - Why not?
'Cause... if they're aliens who traveled here,
that means they have to be highly intelligent
and highly intelligent creatures
wouldn't eat other living creatures.
Wouldn't they?
Oh, my God.
- These chips are dope. - Yeah.
I love eating them with my mouth. Mm.
We always chew with our mouth closed.
[mumbling]
No pointing.
Ah.
There it is. See Henry there? He's not sick.
How do you know?
Look at him, sitting there in bed,
eating a big steaming bowl of chili.
Uh, that looks like brown soup to me.
You're too far away to tell.
Look at it, all dark and thick with chunks.
I know chili when I see it.
I think he's eating brown soup.
No. No, it's not soup.
Jeez, Jasper, if you can't tell the difference
between brown soup and chili,
you're not allowed to look at my monitors.
Well, did you make an appointment?
Not exactly.
Of course you didn't, 'cause you can't commit to anything.
That's not true.
I'm committed to finishing this banana.
Hey ho, here I am.
Good. Please delete my thumbprint
from Henry's locker.
Yeah, we're not gonna be sharing a locker anymore.
You want me to act surprised? 'Cause I'm not.
Why are you not surprised?
Let me guess. She wants you two to be boyfriend and girlfriend
but you're not ready so she's moving out.
Is that about it?
- It's not exactly it. - That's exactly it.
I thought so.
Ah, look, Bianca, I'm almost finished
with this banana I committed to eating.
Hey, Henry, you wanna mango?
Yes.
Ah, you can't just bite into a mango.
You have to peel it first.
I... do what I want.
You want to spit it out into my pocket?
God, yes.
♪ Over your shoulder You know that I told ya ♪
♪ I'll always be picking you up When you're down ♪
♪ So, just turn around ♪
♪ Ooh, ooh, ooh ♪
Hey, Charlotte, will you hold this for a second?
Oh, yeah.
W-Wait, what are you--
[screaming, horns honking]
Uh, I don't get it. It's been two seconds,
the pain should be gone by now.
We need more tests.
No, we've checked enough of my body parts.
What about his butt? Check his butt.
We should check your butt.
Check my butt, how?
Face the other way and touch your toes.
Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no.
You've already stabbed my neck, poured acid on my foot
and toasted my hand.
I think we can all assume
I'm also vulnerable to butt wounds.
Hey you guys... this is great frozen yogurt.
Half that yogurt's mine.
Now, come on. We just need a, like a cool,
easy to remember name
that really says super fast reflexes.
Alright, alright.
[grunting]
How about we just call it SFR?
How 'bout you just stop talking?
[chattering]
What about, uh, mm... Lightning Fightning.
Boo!
[chattering]
Alright, I deserve that.
Hey... I know what we can call your super fast reflexes.
- Say it. - Hit me.
Super... fast... reflexes.
- It works. - Love it.
I can never be replaced by a girl.
What?
A girl?
Oh, I'm sorry. I meant, young woman.
Same thing!
What's wrong? I was just saying that--
Say goodbye to your fudge blast.
Oh, no, no, no, no! [groaning]
- Later. - Wait, don't just leave.
You know, I wasn't trying to take your job before...
but maybe now, I will.
Uh, Charlotte!
[squeaking]
Ah, that squirrel's eating my fudge blast!
[squeaking]
Quit that!
Oh, nacho tower.
He fixed the Auto-Snacker.
I don't care. You ruined our friendship.
And you're not gonna fix that with a platter
of hot Mexican treats.
- Well, I forgive you. - Me, too.
Who's hungry for something good?
- Yeah. - I am, definitely.
Okay. Cool. Because we got...
[both] Hot yogurt!
[chuckles]
Yeah!
Wow. You won a HoYo machine?
Yeah, Dad.
Oh, that's good.
Well, I had a pretty bad day, but this makes up for all--
Get your poopcorn ready.
Yeah, poop of corn.
Now, wait.
Before we play the cartoon, I just wanna say...
none of this would have been possible...
without me.
- Boo! - Get off the stage! Come on!
[smelling]
Oh, yeah, smell that!
[chuckles]
This is amazing pie!
Oh, it's so good.
Oh, yeah! Let's give it up for Bianca's coconut cream pie!
[cheering]
Best pie. Mm.
Okay, my turn.
Well, roll the dice then.
Yeah, baby! I got a six!
[everyone] Mozzle!
[dinging]
- To pie. - To pie.
[everyone] Awe.
These have pickles on 'em.
So?
I thought you both hated pickles.
Well, one day, Jasper, we may not even be here to love
or hate pickles!
So, while I am here, I'm gonna give pickles a chance!
Me, too!
Okay, pickles are gross.
I can't eat this pickle.
You feel that? Oh, you feel that warm bread?
This is how bread should feel.
Right?
- 'Kay, ready? - Yeah.
[both] Ahhh.
What's up?
Mm.
So many leches.
Am I right?
I have an idea.
What do people wanna know most about Captain Man?
What he wears under his Man Suit?
What? No!
Schwoz!
They wanna know where I live and work.
Right. So we have a contest.
"We have a contest."
And the winners get a private tour of the Man Cave.
"Of the Man Cave"
Wait. We can't reveal the secret location
of the Man Cave.
We don't have to.
Gooch will meet the winners somewhere else,
put 'em in sacks...
And then he could bring 'em here and send them down the tubes.
"And send them down the tubes."
Annoying, isn't it?
Oh, look at me! I'm a criminal!
I'm wearing two hats simultaneously!
Oh, look what I'm gonna do to this ice cream cone!
Mm mm mm.
Okay, I got to be honest, this brown soup is really good.
- It's really good soup. - Excellent brown soup.
So thick and brown.
Thanks. It's my mom's recipe.
It won the brown medal at last year's soup festival.
- Oh. - Wow. Really?
No. But she wanted to win... so bad.
Okay, please let me go.
Sure, right after you try
- one of my steaming hot... - What? No!
I don't wanna try that.
...Captain Corndog.
Please, dude, I already ate!
Guys, guys, are ya gonna help me?
- Chugga, chugga, choo choo! - Okay, okay, I'll try it!
There ya go, be a good sidekick.
Okay, give me another one.
Ah.
Billy's right!
Everyone start stuffing ham in your mouth!
Yes.
[music playing]
First of all, I bought these steaks myself
with my own dad's credit card.
And second of all... I don't get scared.
- Yes, you do. - Yes, you do.
Yeah, you get scared all the time
with your tiny little shriek.
Yeah, it's like ho-ho.
No, no, no, it's more high pitched, like, ha!
No, no, you've got to go even higher than that. Ha!
- Ha! - Ha!
Look, I made you a potato.
Nah, nah, nah. Thanks. I appreciate it, Goomer,
but I don't- oh, dang that looks good.
[grunting]
What's going on?
Now, I reverse the molecular polarity
and lippity do, switcharoo.
Oh, pretty.
I'm loving this potato.
[both] Ahhh.
Wanna go to Back Out Steakhouse?
Yeah, I guess.
[dinging]
[music playing]