Donald J. Trump,
president of the United States
and man who's in a bar fight with reality.
Ever since he lost the election,
his people have been going through every court
in the country trying to find a judge
who will help him unlose the election.
But yesterday, he might have hit a dead end.
The Supreme Court has now shot down an effort
by President Trump's allies in Pennsylvania
in that overall effort to try to overturn the election.
Terry, the U.S. Supreme Court seemed to send
a very strong signal late today with, uh, very few words.
They sure did. This was brutal, David, no question about it.
It took the Supreme Court just 34 minutes
between the time that President Trump's allies in Pennsylvania
filed their brief in this case and a one-sentence order
from the Supreme Court rejecting that entire case.
Uh, no reasoning, just, "No, get out of here."
And there were no recorded dissents by any of the justices,
including Amy Coney Barrett and Neil Gorsuch
and Brett Kavanaugh, all of whom
were appointed by President Trump.
BRIAN WILLIAMS: It came in a single sentence, and we quote,
"The application for injunctive relief
"presented to Justice Alito and by him
referred to the Court is denied."
Oof. Man.
Trump is taking Ls, people.
Not only did they shut this case down,
but they shut it down in just 34 minutes.
They didn't even pretend that they were gonna consider it.
This is like asking somebody out
and they just shut you down immediately.
Hey, would you like to...
-No. -...go out with me?
And Trump must be especially butt-hurt
that the justices he appointed
didn't do anything about this.
Because, in his mind, he thinks that they owe him big-time.
He's probably like,
What the hell, Brett?
I stuck with you when everyone said
you were a creepy drunk,
but now you won't let me be president
just because I didn't get enough votes?
All of a sudden, now you know
the meaning of the word "no," Brett, huh?
I hate all of you! Neil, Brett,
and you hurt me most of all, Amy Coney Island.
But here's the truth, man. You can't blame the Supreme Court
for not wanting to get involved in Trump's case.
Because we all have that one friend
that when you see them crying, you think,
"You know what, I'm just gonna keep walking,
'cause if I try to help, it's gonna become a whole thing."
So, this looks like it could be the end
for Trump's legal efforts, because he can't
appeal a higher court than the Supreme Court.
I mean, maybe he'll try appeal to God. Who knows?
Look, I know I'm only asking for your help
when I'm walking down a ramp,
but this one's important, big guy.
And can we just take a moment to reflect on how hard
this past month has been for Trump's people?
Because it's not easy to overturn a democracy.
It's actually taking a physical toll on them.
I mean, Trump's hair went grey overnight,
his legal team is riddled with corona,
and now one of Trump's top supporters,
Congressman Louie Gohmert,
is literally falling apart.
REPORTER: It was an embarrassing moment
for Texas Republican Louie Gohmert.
I have, uh... consulted,
been with, uh, our Afghan allies
many times since 2000...
2001.
REPORTER: His tooth fell out in the middle of a press conference
on Capitol Hill. The congressman didn't miss a beat.
He quickly caught it with his tongue,
tucked it away in his cheek, and kept speaking.
Gohmert tweeted later, accusing reporters of being
more interested in a temporary crown coming loose
than they were in covering claims of election fraud
by the president.
That is the most disgusting thing
I have ever seen in 2020.
And remember, I've seen everything.
I mean, I saw Rudy's hair melt.
I saw a human woman marry an inside-out ferret.
But as disgusting as it is, it's still pretty funny, man.
I mean, Trump's fraud cases are getting
knocked out of their court so hard
that other people are losing their teeth.
And it's not like Louie over here can give that tooth
to the Tooth Fairy, 'cause she's gonna be like,
"Nuh-uh. I didn't sign up for this shit.
I buy teeth from kids,
not middle-aged Cabbage Patch dolls."
And I love how he tried to move on like nothing happened.
Did you see that? Huh?
Tried to move on, like a tooth didn't... My man, my man.
I don't care what side of history you're on.
If your tooth falls out mid-speech,
your argument is over.
I know it's not fair, but that's the way it is.
If that happened to FDR, even he would have been like,
December 7, 1941,
a date which will live in infamy...
Oh, oh, shit my tooth.
Forget it. Congrats, Japan, you've won.
But let's move on.
As we enter the second year of the coronavirus pandemic,
there is one thing
on top of everybody's holiday wish list:
a PlayStation 5. And after that,
a vaccine.
And Santa's working hard to make it happen.
Great Britain has already begun vaccinations.
The United States is close behind,
and China has now announced
that its new vaccine is 86% effective.
But the first country to start mass vaccinations
was actually Russia.
And the reason they were able to be the first
is that they didn't finish testing it first,
which might be why things haven't been
going great with it so far.
REPORTER: Interesting request for those getting a vaccine
in Russia-- officials telling citizens
"Please avoid drinking alcohol
for two months after being inoculated."
They say that alcohol impacts the immune system.
There have been some questions
about the efficacy of Russia's vaccine.
Reports say medical workers who have been vaccinated
are still getting COVID.
Vladimir Putin has also refused to take it.
Wow. There's a lot to unpack here.
First off, Russia's vaccine
doesn't allow you to drink alcohol?
I mean, this is a tough situation, because the only way
you would agree to take a Russian vaccine
is if you were totally shitfaced.
Not to mention, not drinking is gonna cause a lot of problems,
because it means that a lot of Russians are gonna
be seeing Russia sober for the first time.
(Russian accent): What is this?
My home is frozen wasteland where top food is beets?
What the hell is this place?
I thought I live in Caribbean.
(regular accent): Also, it doesn't build public confidence
in the vaccine if your leader is like,
(Russian accent): I'll take my chances with corona.
That vaccine is poison, and trust me,
I know what is poison.