-If you wish to talk, text 401-472-GECK.
-I just don't have a lot of control in my real life.
-I have a bad drunk personality.
-She's pregnant, the guy that she cheated on me with.
-I found out that I was related to the guy that I was dating.
And sure enough, we are actually twins.
-Hmm.
This is the part of the call where I ask you,
are you doing alright?
The whole thing of, like, I'm giving callers therapy...
Your grandma doesn't say she loves you back?
-People are willing to share these big things.
-I was in jail for my 37th birthday.
-There's a lot of pressure in doing something like this.
-My mom recently passed away.
-I'm sorry to hear that.
It's, like, way more than I expected.
-The number-one thing that people want to talk about
is themselves.
-It's a weird juxtaposition,
because, well, I feel lonely all the time.
I don't know if it's like, does the Therapy Gecko need therapy?
But maybe it is. I don't know.
Usually when I close this laptop,
I'm just alone in a room. It's just me.
You said you're freaking out.
What are you afraid is going to happen?
♪♪
Alright.
Hello, hello, hello.
Okay, that works.
Hey, what's up?
-Hi. What are you doing?
-I'm being a gecko and talking to people. What are you doing?
My name is Lyle, and I am a gecko on the computer.
I dress up as a gecko
and talk to anonymous strangers from the internet
about pretty much whatever they want to talk to me about.
You see a phone number, you see it says "Therapy Gecko."
I'm a green man on the computer taking phone calls.
What are thoughts -- Do you have any thoughts today?
-I was in a coma for about a year,
woke up, and that was six months ago,
and just trying to figure shit out, I guess.
-How did you get into a coma?
-I was hunting with one of my friends,
and I got shot in the back of the head.
Starting to think it wasn't an accident.
-Really?
Sometimes it's very silly, ridiculous stuff.
How did you rip a goat in half?
And other times, it's more sincere stuff.
-I'm addicted to hookers.
-Your dad fucks your grandpa?
-Yes, absolutely.
-It's always a myriad of the human experience.
The very beginning was...
A lot of questions.
...June 2020.
You know, it was COVID. I was living at home
in my mom's basement, and the office was closed.
I had nothing to do. Everything was on the internet.
The Reddit Public Access Network,
it got really popular during the pandemic.
One final question. Do we know...
I started just screwing around, wearing a gecko costume
and taking phone calls.
-Call from... -Jacob.
[
-What is your life, Jacob? What are you up to?
-Wondering all about the gecko bathwater.
That seems like a very interesting thing.
I think that would be very relaxing.
-Ooh, okay. Are you interested in buying a cup?
The very first clip that I posted on TikTok
got like 2.5 million views.
What's the worst thing that you've ever done?
-One time I was tubing down the Delaware River,
and I had really bad diarrhea.
-I got very lucky that that clip went so extremely viral
the way that it did off the bat.
Because as much as I enjoy doing what I do,
I would have probably given up
and moved on and done something else
if this hadn't caught fire so immediately.
-Is this Geck? -It is.
-Oh, my God. It's so wonderful to speak with you.
-Almost every time I'd stream,
it would go to the front page of Reddit,
so I had like 40,000 people watching and calling in.
Hello?
-Oh. Oh, shit. Hi, Lyle.
-I can't believe I got on right away.
-I think when I first started doing this,
I was doing more of a character and more of a put-on.
Tell me everything, tell me nothing. I want to know.
When you're talking to people, when you're streaming
and doing this for three hours,
by 2.5 hours, it's hard to be doing a put-on.
Hello?
As time has gone on,
I started being a little bit more genuine and myself on here.
Somebody will tell me something...
-The problem is my boyfriend is a YouTuber.
-...and tell me that they've never
talked to anyone else about it.
-She says that she's pregnant,
and I'm like, "Okay, well, it's got to be --
it's got to be the guy that she cheated on me with," you know?
-I feel very honored that people are willing
to talk on this show
about stuff that they won't talk to anyone else about.
♪♪
About a year after doing therapy,
I did my very first live show in Brooklyn.
This whole thing started in the pandemic,
where everything was online.
And so I have way more fun being out and about
and seeing people's faces
and being around people than I do, like,
recording the podcast, which I do alone in a room.
Hey, hello. This is a test of this microphone.
And it sounds like it was successful.
-So, how are you feeling about the show?
-I am excited, feeling the wheels are greased.
-Yeah, I mean, you've been doing this for a long time now.
-You were one of the first guests on the show.
-Mm-hmm, mm-hmm.
-Look, to balance out what my sister said...
-Sorry, I'm being honest. -...I think...
We got a touching e-mail from this guy Chris,
who told us that his sister had unfortunately passed away
a few years ago of a drug overdose.
He was very touched by how close we were.
-Mm-hmm. -And it kind of reminded him
of his relationship with his sister.
-And you sent me that e-mail. -Yeah.
-And I still have it, and I show it to people all the time.
Like, you're always -- If you're going to do something,
you're going to do it fully,
and I think that's not something that anybody can do.
Anybody can dress up like a gecko online,
and, like, people will find it maybe slightly interesting.
But they're not going to blow up to the way that you are,
because they're not as interested
as making it a phenomenon as you are.
-When I first started,
I was terrified to do live shows.
I was scared to even do it in front of 40 people,
and now some of the shows have like 400, 500 folks.
If I'm doing five of them in a row,
by the fourth one, I'm feeling a little bit more confident.
[ Cheers and applause ]
-The story starts in middle school.
-How you doing, man? -I'm doing okay.
-Tell me about these friends that think you're schizophrenic.
-I've met a lot of people from the cast of "Ozark."
-I've always figured that I have episodic depression.
Like, it just comes on in monthly spurts, basically.
-When I'm talking to you, I'm there.
I'm with you, and I'm in that connection.
I don't know if I can promise anything after that moment.
But I always promise the moment.
As a guy who regularly dresses up as a lizard
and pretends to be a therapist,
I don't think you're schizophrenic.
[ Laughter ]
I hope you're enjoying this time hanging out with your bros.
'Cause it sounds nice.
This is the most important question,
in my opinion, of this story --
At the end of the day, did you make any friends?
-I made a lot of friends, Geck.
-Alright. [ Cheers and applause ]
There, I said it. Thank you guys for having me.
♪♪
Hey. [ Crowd cheers ]
I definitely do feel more confident
when I'm in the gecko suit.
Yes, I can!
I mean, I still get nervous talking to people
the way that I think anyone would.
Are you serious? This is gonna be your first tattoo?
-[ Laughing ] Yeah. -Seriously?
-Geck to you, man.
-But I definitely feel more willing to put myself out there,
I think, than when I'm just, like, alone,
when I'm just, like, a guy.
What's up?
When I'm in the gecko suit,
there's less vulnerability,
because you're, like, doing a thing,
or you're, like, doing a bit.
-I'm a huge fan.
Yeah.
-When I'm just myself
and I'm, like, trying to talk to somebody,
you have to put yourself out there as a human being
desiring actual human connection,
and that's -- it's a much more vulnerable place.
-I feel like every episode I listen to is pertinent
to what's going on in my life at that point,
and I'm like, "Holy shit!
This person in Montana who's going through this
is also understanding the same thing that I'm going through,"
and it's really cool, just the connection of it all.
-Geck for life. Lyle forever. Geck forever.
♪♪
-Someone gave this to me in Charlotte, North Carolina.
This part was in her leg.
Charm bracelet someone made.
Somebody gave me a sword.
It's weird because it's obviously something
that people have connected with enough to make all this stuff
and to come out and see me and, you know,
to listen week after week and all that.
There's all these people who are calling me
and writing me letters and coming up to tell me
that they appreciate me and the show.
"Lyle the lizard,
it was nice talking to you a few weeks ago.
I'm sorry our conversation was cut short because my phone died,
but you still have permission to use my skin
for Nábrókarstafur necropants.
From Clint."
In terms of feeling loved by people,
it doesn't feel like a real thing on a daily basis.
It's a weird juxtaposition,
because I -- well, I feel lonely all the time.
My personal mental health over the years
has had a lot of highs and lows,
so a lot of times were
very frustrated or depressed or hopeless.
I've suffered from very low self-esteem,
thinking that I suck, feeling, like, kind of aimless.
I mean, this is a thing, I think, with a lot of people
who make stuff on the internet, is you're thinking, like,
"Well, how long is this really going to last?"
I'm here at the Philadelphia Flower Convention
to see what all the buzz is about,
maybe kiss some pretty flowers. Mwah!
It's more fun being a thing than a guy.
The gecko, I'm myself.
It's one of the reasons,
I think, that people are more comfortable
talking to me, is because I'm in this costume
and I'm not, like, just some dude.
-We're going to look at your bar mitzvah album.
-When I was a kid, I was really afraid of, like,
attracting any attention to myself, I feel like.
-Ehh.
-Let's see what's going on, what's new in the school.
-Why?
-I always wanted to make stuff
and do stand-up or make movies.
Could we stop the interview?
It has been a sort of recent thing of making things
that center around other people.
It feels more expansive and exciting
than just, like, being stuck in my own head.
-You draw people out, I think.
-I feel like I've always been very cur--
-Curious, yeah. -Curious, yeah.
-But you've not been one -- Unlike your sister,
you've not been one to give out advice.
-Well I'm not -- You know, the show --
On the surface or at a glance,
it looks like it's about, like...
It's not an advice show.
-No. -It's more of a -- It's not.
-Remember we had the whole discussion about,
you gotta do a disclaimer that you're not a licensed therapist?
-I think it's pretty apparent
that I'm not a licensed therapist.
Have you spoken to a real therapist about this?
-[ Crying ] No, not this specifically.
-It sounds a lot more normal and okay
when I talk to you about it, so thank you for that.
♪♪
-I moved to L.A. about two years ago from Baltimore.
I thought, "This is kind of where
people who make stuff are."
I love Venice because I like a walkable place
where there's, like, energy and people.
-Oh, awesome! The green man!
-Oh, how are you doing? -Good, and how are you?
-I'm doing good. -I love it.
-Thank you. -I love the green.
-What are you doing out on the beach today?
-I'm doing what you're doing.
-Really? Where do you think we go when we die?
-Oh, see, look.
That right there, that's crazy, bro.
Dude, and sometimes I think about that.
What if it's just nothing? Like when you go to sleep.
-Mm-hmm.
I think I thought to myself at one point, like,
the more experience that I have putting myself out there
and doing stuff like this,
the less anxious I'll get about doing it.
But I kind of have to overcome that anxiety every single time.
People are willing to share these big things. It's cool.
The whole thing, it's, like, way more than I expected.
There's a lot of pressure in doing something like this,
I think.
♪♪
I know it's called Therapy Gecko and I've never changed it,
but I'm just not interested in presenting it as,
"I'm here to be the mental health guy."
It's just, I'm a gecko and I'm talking to people,
and whatever happens as a result of that is the show.
Hello, and welcome, and hi, and welcome.
This is a show about being a gecko
and talking to people.
That's it.
I'm going to take some calls just randomly.
401-472-GECK.
What's up?
-This is the gecko guy.
-Oh! Hi! How are you?
-Hey, what's up?
-Hi. What are you doing?
-I'm being a gecko and talking to people. What are you doing?
-Oh, my God, I'm laying on my couch,
and, honestly, I knew tonight
was going to be the night I was going to talk to you.
-Feels hard a lot, people talking to me
about intense stuff.
I wish I knew the best way to respond.
Ethan, what's going on with you today, man?
-So, honestly, lately, man, I've been sort of down.
My mom recently passed away.
-I'm sorry to hear that.
-My mom was on life support, and we had to take her off.
It was really hard. I was there the whole time, you know.
-I'm sorry to hear about that, man.
How long ago was this?
-About a month or two ago.
-Really? And, like, how have you been?
A lot of the time, doing the stream
can kind of be therapy for me.
When I'm alone and I'm not doing anything,
I'm just anxious and depressed and whatnot.
There is something about the hour or two hours
that I spend on the phone with other people,
where I am engaged with someone,
talking about them and their life,
and I'm, like, out of my own head
and I'm in somebody's else's head,
batting around whatever's going on with them.
-Thank you, Lyle, so much for this chance to talk to you.
You're just awesome, man. Like, I hope you know that.
-Thank you.
you take the self-care,
because I watched some of your videos, and I don't know
if you always, like, take the self-care you need.
But make sure you're taking that self-care and love
for yourself.
-Well, thanks for calling, Ethan.
I hope you have a good rest of the night.
With that last caller, it's like therapeutic for me,
to hear how positive he's being about this stuff.
Normally, I shut the computer and move on.
It's kind of nice to be talking to you about this,
because usually when I close this laptop,
I'm just alone in a room. It's just me.
When I sit here with you and I'm, like,
recapping my feelings about the phone calls
that I just took and the people and everything,
it makes me feel like it happened.
When I do my live shows and I meet people,
and they're like, "Yeah, I remember that one phone call
you had with that person about that thing,"
I almost have this reaction in my head where I'm like,
"Oh, I didn't realize anybody --
I didn't realize other people were listening to that."
It weirdly feels like something I'm experiencing alone,
even though it's being broadcast to so many people.
Sometimes it can be lonely living out here
or being on tour by myself.
Normally, after I finish my streams,
I'll go out and get food and kind of like decompress.
There have been a few nights, 3:00 a.m., in my own brain,
I go on Google and I search how to become a real therapist.
I was like, "Let me see."
Like, some -- like, 10 years of school.
And I'm like, "No, I'll stick to Twitch."
Well, Mateo, you've Therapy-Geckoed me this evening.
-And I'm very blessed that you gave me the chance
and you called me back.
-Yeah, of course, man. Dude, is there anything else
you want to say or talk about before we go?
-A blessing doesn't always have to feel good.
Sometimes they hurt, you know?
-Mm-hmm. You're a cool guy, Mateo.
I'm enjoying talking to you.
[ Insects chirping ]
Right now, if you wish to talk,
text 401-472-GECK, 401-4325...
with your name, your age,
and what it is you would like to talk about.